Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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