covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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