Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
