Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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