now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Randomize
