Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
organizing the empties. That sober.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
