Midget sex pt 2 tonight
My first STD was from a foam party
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
