I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
