dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
