I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
this boner is exhausting
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
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