I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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