Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
