just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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