im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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