In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
where does the pee come out of this thing
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
