I feel like I'm in dance class right now
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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