thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
vagina is talking i cant
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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