oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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