you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Randomize