And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize
