I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize