...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize
