guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
