i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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