WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
