Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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