I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
