i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
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Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
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Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
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