Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize