it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
