you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
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