It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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