And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Randomize
