it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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