I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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