This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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