Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Randomize