She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize