I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
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