I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
