Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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