dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
