I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize