You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
