your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize