well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
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