garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
he puts the penis in happiness.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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