Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
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