Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Randomize
