That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
